Let's ramble awhile, shall we?

Random thoughts continuing from and pertaining to previous post:

Maybe it's a strength to have a small interest and capacity for many things, even if it means I don't have the 'one thing' that I wish I did.   (ie: does contentment possibly play a roll here?)  ;)

There have been many times in the past (and 'in the past' is the operative phrase here) where it felt like being a stay at home mom was a perfect fit for me-a little decorating, a little fashion, a little cooking and baking, a little money/finances, a little education, children's books, parties, quality time with people i love, etc. etc.  you get the point.  I think though as the number of kids and their cooresponding activities has increased, all those  things that I enjoyed in the past become just another thing on the list that I need to hurry up and get done.  Besides that, they are on a list with a lot of things I don't find fun or feel natural at at all.  Cleaning, laundry, confrontation, discipline, helping obstinate people, etc. again. 

As I thought about things that I do/don't do and racked my brain for the 'perfect thing' for me, one idea I came up with was a school librarian.  I love literature and resources, possibly children's specifically. I wouldn't want to teach, but I like the education process.  I could collaborate with teachers and assist them and students in finding just the right thing, but without being 'in charge'.  It honestly sounds rather perfect.  (Not to mention the tangible affirmation of a check every week.)  But there are down sides to it, too.  Like since I'm not really a type A personality, I'm pretty much positive that a full time job is not a good idea for me because of the other things in life that I value. 

So as I pondered through all these things, I was struck anew with the fact that staying at home being a mother gives me the opportunity to do and be a lot of who I am.  Obviously not all of whom I am or all of who I could be, but a lot.  It made me think that I need to find a way to slow down and enjoy it when I'm doing things like making supper.  Try not to be bogged down with all the other things that still need done "as soon as I get these onions chopped".

and onto another random thought; Since I pointed out how my fashion predicitons have come true in the past, I think it's only fair to point out when I fail.  Those flowy pants I desired and envisioned (and then saw on anthropologie a couple years later) never made it out of the lounge section of the store.  I ordered a pair, and it wasn't the fabric/look I imagined and wanted.  This combined with the fact that I haven't even desired a certain piece in the fashion department for years may point the the fact that I'm losing my touch.  :)

Happy Wednesday!