Recovery Part 3. Day to Day.

It's morning and I slowly wake and find my mouth glued together due to extreme dryness. I work up some saliva so I can open my mouth without ripping my skin. I go take my thyroid medicines. I can't eat or drink anything but water for 45 minutes to an hour after that, so I generally go get ready for the day. Soon I start to feel the familiar burning and lump in my throat that has plagued me for almost two years now.

I eat breakfast, get the youngest two off to school and get going on chores. There may be some muscle pain, cramping or twitching, but I try to ignore it and keep moving. Most of the time my energy is better than before, but then randomly I will walk up our stairs and just need to go lie down and rest awhile. 

I go into town to do some errands. I'm so glad I am at the place I can get my groceries, the kids' clothes, and even stuff for myself again. I get on the interstate to head home and an irrational wave of fear washes over me. I give myself a firm little talk and divert my attention. It passes, and I get home just fine. 

I make lunch and plan supper. Eating is always a bit of a drama. Balancing what sounds good, is available, fits a (largely) gluten free and dairy free diet, and won't aggravate whatever level of acid reflux I'm dealing with. The burning in my chest and throat waxes and wanes throughout the day. When I forget and sing or yell or talk too much lately, I am rewarded with deep pain in my throat. I think the burning is affecting my vocal chords. 

I battle fear. Will this never end? What diet do I need to try next? Is it wrong to keep trying? Am I just supposed to wait for a miracle? Will I lose my voice entirely? Will I get esophageal cancer if this never goes away? Will I get more diseases due to my acid reducing meds that are known to lead to nutritional deficiencies? Etc. Etc. Ad nauseam.

I take my second dose of thyroid medicine for the day. This time it doesn't have to be kept away from food and drink. The family slowly comes home. We talk. I prod them through homework and chores. My face suddenly feels flushed and I feel a little weird/off. Then supper, dishes, bedtime routine. Some nights I have energy to enjoy hanging out with Jaret for awhile. Sometimes I lay down and don't move again. I take my acid reducer drug, drink some slippery elm to soothe my gi system and rest. 

Some nights I sleep through with out disturbances. Sometimes I start to sleep and jerk awake with panicky feelings. Sometimes I fall asleep great and then wake up in the middle of the night and lie there for an hour or two. Overall, it's much better than it was!

So that's a peak into the health challenges in my life at this point.